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June 21, 2007

FEAR

So, I ran 3 miles this morning.

Or sortof.

I ran some.

And I walked some.

I have no idea why I felt like walking. Maybe it was because I never ran into 26Marathons. Or maybe it was because I was tired. Or maybe. Just maybe. It was because I was scared.

Scared of not finishing. Scared of running an 11 minute mile (not that there is anything wrong with that, but I know I'm faster than that). Scared of who knows what.

I was kindof mad at myself for being such a wuss. I mean, I did run a 26:26 5k last weekend without walking. And I didn't die. So what gives? I know that it's just my brain doing some kind of weird crazy thing to make feel less than what I really am. But what do I do about it? At the very last 1/2 mile I started chanting to myself "i am a runner...i am a runner...." and that seemed to help. Or maybe it was just that I was on the last 1/2 mile and knew I was almost done. Whatever is going on, I do not like it! I should be able to run 3 miles, nonstop, in less than 26 minutes. Period.

So, on to work and look what I found in my inbox: (click here)

surprise, surprise. Guess just what the doctor ordered to get my butt in gear.

Plan for the rest of the week: 3 miles tomorrow, 9:00 min pace; 5k on Saturday (I WILL break 26 minutes!), rest on Sunday.

Have a great weekend!

4 comments:

jeff said...

i soooo want to see you start doing some stuff on the track. i think you're well primed to start doing intervals to increase your speed. plus, doing a hard track workout gives you the license to then run slow on your recovery runs. ;)

Kurt said...

I think you need more rest.

We all have lousy training days even some of us who are average.

I agree with Jeff, run more track works (wait I said that a few months ago) and slowly build up your base.

Phil said...

There is nothing like success to wipe out a little doubt. Good luck this weekend.

Meagan said...

Best of luck this weekend!!! Just keep up the active recovery and stay mentally strong, and you'll be fine!