When I was younger I was never the smartest kid, or the kid with the parents who had the most money, or the kid who could play any sport. I was just another kid. But I did (and still do) possess a gift. The gift of B.S.ing my way through life. You see, I may not have scored well on tests, but I knew that if I asked for an extra credit assignment I would still make A's. It wasn't that my projects were great or fabulous or well written or whatever. It was that I took the initiative to ask and that counted for a whole lot more than the actual work. I figured this out early. And it has carried me through life. Is it wrong? I'm not really sure. Have I been successful because of it? Absolutely. It's more than B.S.ing though...it takes a certain amount of brown nosing as well. Which I was/am equally good at. I always know how to dress the part. And how to say the right thing...or in my case, I don't usually say a whole lot (it's about quality not quantity) when I'm trying to make an impression. I put on a big smile, and stand there nodding my head looking pretty in my pressed suit and interject when I feel it's appropriate. I think my mom taught me how to do this. And, I am not bragging about it. I'm merely setting the stage for the rest of my story.
So, speed up to 2005 when I decide that I'm going to run a marathon. [You can probably figure out where I'm going with this.] Training for this marathon has taught me so much about myself. I have learned patience, perserverance, structure, and a whole lot more. But, one thing that I did not realize that it would teach me, is that I cannot B.S. my way through it. This is the first thing that I think I've ever done in my life that a pretty smile and some nice shoes will not get me through. My new Nike running shorts are not going to make my legs go faster. I can't ask the organizers of the San Diego marathon if I can get some extra credit if I don't make it to mile 26.2.
I-just-have-to-do-it. All by myself (well, with T by my side!). And that is the scariest thought. That I might actually complete something because I put my heart, my soul, and my best foot forward (no pun intended) and ran. It's scary. And it's exciting. It's scary-exciting. It's one more stage in my life. And I can't wait to get there.
From Maroon 5: Secret
"Now I don’t know you
But I want you so bad
Everyone has a secret
But can they keep it
Oh no they can’t"
So, there's my secret that I can't keep anymore.
Update on Doctors Appt:
He said I was fine. That it is just my bodies way of saying "hey, you are built to run out of a cave, kill something, and drag it home...not to run 26 miles". I promise that is really what he said. He said that with 36 days left until the marathon, that it is time to put on a serious training hat and think about everything i do in relation to running. That includes no sandals, no flip flops. Only lace-up shoes or loafers. Okay. I can live with that. He also said I have to put heat on both ankles BEFORE i run and ice after. And while I'm at my desk during the day to do some flexibility and range of motion exercises. I can do that too! He said that there was no inflammation and that I had great flexibility for the right ankle. He checked the left one as well, and I was surprised to hear that I have some inflammation on the top tendon that runs along the top of my ankle (on the inside). I haven't had any pain there. But he said it was nothing to get upset about and that the heat-pre and ice-post would do the trick. Yahoo! He also said that he thinks my physical therapist's training schedule is too agressive, but that i am tolerating it well and coupled with the run/walk, he's okay with it. He said that now I have to be more structured than I've been and think about every detail of every day with running in mind. He said to even think about my socks. No worn out socks. Break in new ones before the marathon, etc. I've got all that under control. Oh, and he said no kayaking...okie dokie...cause i'm not a kayaker anyway (T is)...but it's just funny that he said that...
13 miles tomorrow. 13-miles. Can't wait :)