March 21, 2006

I'm Done....

With physical therapy that is!!!!! I guess I am actually a pretty good patient, even though I don't always follow all the rules...sigh....but the fact of the matter, is I'm done and I hope to never ever ever ever ever have to go through that again. Not because it just wasn't too much fun, and not because even with insurance it was costing me my shoe allowance money, but mainly because my self-esteem went to hell in hand basket. Really. I'm not kidding. I actually wrote a post earlier today that I didn't publish all about my self-esteem. And I prolly still won't publish it but I'll keep it as a constant reminder that sometimes my mind can play dirty tricks on me.

Cause, hello, I have never had a self-esteem problem in my life. Not that I've been one of those snobby, princess types...but I have always just really really liked myself. Nothing wrong with that. I didn't make a prerequisite for every one else to like me, so I wasn't hurting no one :) At any rate, the last few weeks I've felt like a troll. A fat, ugly, stupid troll that doesn't know how to run right. And man, I'm far from that :) (I'm soooooooooooooooo glad the ole me is back!) Well, enough about how much I like myself.

Let's talk about runnning. And the fact that I get to do it. And the fact that my PT thinks I still have a shot to run in San Diego. Although I won't be breakin any records, he has the utmost confidence that I will finish...before sun down. And hey, that's good enough for me. The goal is to finish. The goal is to finish. The goal is to finish.

So, my new schedule goes something like this:

Run every other day for the next 2 weeks.
Run, walk...9-1...every time...even if I don't feel like it.
No hills for 2 weeks.
On Apr 1, I can bump it up to 5 miles.
Thereafter, Sat long runs can be bumped up in 2 mile increments.
But I have to continue to stay within 3-5 miles per day during the week.
If everything goes well, I'll top out at 19 miles on May 20 and then start to taper.

And i'm so excited I could pee in my pants :)

I'm glad the old me is back. The one who had a purpose for doing this. The one who had 125% confidence in herself. The one who knew she could do it.

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